February 2010


No.. this one is not about me baring all and daring all about my various passwords.. 😀

It is about my uncanny ability to forget passwords…. and an even more amazing ability to remember them when I have successfully locked out all my accounts!

The Internet is to be blamed for all this password menace. Before the Internet came into our lives, the only password we ever needed was to open the door to the cave of the 40 thieves of the “Ali Baba and 40 thieves” fame…. and that password was no great shakes either… “Khul jaa sim sim”.. or “Open sesame”… and lo and behold… the world of treasures opened up… glittering and gleaming, dazzling and blinding!

One password was good enough…

… not now…

I have a password for the blog

…and a password for my twitter account

…and passwords for my 4-5 email ids

…and a password to unlock my computer

…and password to log int my company network

…and passwords for various banking sites

…and passwords to pay mobile bills

…and broadband bills

…and to book tickets to the movies

… or the Indian Railway…

…or to frequent flier programs..

… and suitcases

…and telephones (!!)

…and social networking sites

…and weight loss sites 😦

….(remember any more)

And how creative can one really get with passwords?? Or repetitive or innovative… I tend to engage all my crazy thoughts while I change a password… and so it is obvious that my passwords are so out of the world.. .that I cannot remember them at all when I need to

…and then I try and try… but lock all my accounts…

…and the much later ( when it is of no use ) .. I have “Eureka” moments where all remember all my passwords to the tiniest detail of the last alpha numeric character!

A few more passwords… and you will have me locked out of my own blog.. I’m telling!

There has to be a novel, ingenuous and yet “secret” enough way of remembering them! What do you guys do? Or am I so stressed out that I need special treatment??

Tell me people… is it equally difficult for you??? (Please say yes!)

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… and Ishiqiya wins! 🙂

We did back to back movies this weekend…10 am Ishiqiya and 3 pm MNIK, with a leisurely lunch and a leisurely walk down MG road thrown in between (Oh btw.. B’lore does have a summer season!, and yessir, it is QUITE hot)

But before the reviews, rants and raves… just a quick ‘aside’ to mention H’s idiosyn’crazies’.  One more topics of our weekly weekly fights 😀

H has a tendency to take his time with all the things that he can take his time with…. so much.. that he sometimes behaves like the Ishaan Awasthi ( fro Taare Zaameen Pe.. remember?).   He has the capability of slipping into his “drift mode” without notice. We will be completely rushed while going someplace… and I will be frantically locking doors and checking lights and fans… and what does the dear ‘ol guy do…. he takes that five minute to check Facebook… and if I get irritated or we get late… ofcourse it was all my fault… cause he was all dressed and ready to go… and “I” got everyone late… which is irksome… coz its always “I” who is locking/checking/switching off/closing/searching for things..! OBVIOUSLY 😀

And then… if I ever… ever tell him to take care of things, while I take my time getting dressed up….and if we get late… then obviously again… I am at fault. The man drifts around, and refuses to multitask… or to pace up or pace down depending on the situation…. and I get the blame. Ishaan Avasthi… not a doubt… and to add to that the guy has mastered the art of guilt tripping me! ( Help! peepal…!) And so as the story goes.. I lose my temper… we fight…. we make up… and the cycle repeats each time we go out anywhere.

And then… to add to my misery… H also expects me to ‘dress up’… Now I’m a regular jeans -Tshirt -sneakers sorts. No matching the earrings to the fancy girlie tops types. I would like to dress up in my own time… but who does it with all so much responsiblities of the locks and the switches hanging on their heads… And I think it is time to get H to understand.

….so sneaky me has thought of a plan. I am hencforth going to start getting dressed before he does, comment on how he dresses after we leave the house and he can do nothing about it, get him to take responsibility of the locks and the like… and just behave like a pretty “I’m so confused and helpless” bimbo for some days.. and watch the fun…

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned… I say!

…and that incidently is also ze topic of the movie Ishiqiya…. and which incidently.. is why… I ze loves it!

Ishiqiya is a fresh movie,  its stylized, and raunchy, and yet honest. The best thing about it is that it is not over the top, in how it portrays emotions, it is not cliched  and has enough interesting episodes to keep you glued.  And though I’ve heard lots about how it ends… I actually liked that it ended the way it did (No plot spoiler here!) I recommend!

As for MNIK. Its typical KJo fare. The things that make you laugh.. the things that make you cry…. infact… I have a sneaky suspicions that this is a formula that he has evolved… If you make the audience laugh and cry enough times… they love you. (Sadism!). The plot was not great shakes…. but do watch it for SRK. This is one of the few movies where the man has actually acted.  Kajol looks like a million bucks! What is it about married women who have kids… they just get prettier and prettier!

Now… both are watchable, though maybe not twice! But if I had to choose between the two… I would definitely recommend Ishiqiya.

Its a pity that its being taken off most of the theatres here in Bangalore, Do watch it while you can!

Yesterday we got to know that one of my batch mates got featured in a leading financial daily. And it got me so jealous that you can’t even imagine.  I was angry… and I wanted to shoot a sarcy smarty pants reply to some of my friends on the list… but I didn’t… and  for the next few hours… I could only think… “Damn… arrogant, no good, show off”… I recalled memories of this guy during classes… “Mr Know it all”… And the truth is… he wasn’t really talented. Not even good in studies… or in the way he thought about things…Just one of those guys who think they are good.

Maybe that arrogant confident worked for him…. Maybe it was pure luck that he got into assignments that propelled him forward… the truth is… I don’t think he deserves any of the accolades, promotions, assignments that he has been getting.

And I on the other hand… was the one winning all the case study competitions, all the debates, writing all the thought papers, and here I am, writing about being “detached” about my work.  

I felt ashamed of myself.  I felt like a loser hippocrite.

I was always unsure about the work I was doing… I have a feeling that I can do much more… and that my talent is not being used enough…but then… I never felt confident enough in my so-called talent to fight the system. I’ve never felt angry enough at not getting my due… and saying.. “Chuck it… your loss..” and then going and doing something so groundbreaking that it made everyone stand up and take notice.

I have just drifted along. I have adjusted…. Tried to look for positives… tried to be content, balancing everything in life. H, our life, our weekends, our health. On most days, this philosophy works. But on other days.. when I hear about fancy designations… and better work being dished out to people who I once bettered…it unsettles me.

I miss being that go-getter, I thought I would be, when I was younger. All the little adjustments I make in my routine to accomodate H… begin to rankle me… my role begins to rankle me… at home, and in office.  I rue all  the oppurtunities that I could have taken, and didn’t for one reason or the other.

Somehow, that passion for work has taken a beating. Dunno what has  happened to me… I was never like this! I was competitive, and smart, and fiery, and now I’m just a drifter. Maybe marriage has got something to do with it, but it would be unfair to blame it all on marriage. Its my motivation that’s gone… nothing interests me.

On most days I shrug this feeling aside… because heck… life is enjoyable and sunshiny and nice and I am doing a lot of things away from work that I love. I wish I could feel that way about work too…. and work as hard, as dedicately, as smartly and with as much passion as I could before…

I know I can’t work without passion.  And I don’t know whether to seek balance in my life or focus on that one thing called work. Every time I take sides… I end up missing the other.

What do you think can be done? Have you ever felt this way? What did you do?? Do you think the guys have an advantage??

The source of this post is three “happenings” in my life this week.

Happening No. 1: We watched “Shallow Hal”

Happening No. 2: We watched our friend “Anonymous” jump around like a monkey on matrimonial sites

Happening No. 3: I read this article

Now as a result of these three happenings… I got thinking. Are men really that superficial about what they look for in the opposite sex? And two, are women seriously that dissatisfied with their bodies? The “Anonymous” monkey friend also fits into this scheme as you will know in just a minute.

Shallow Hal: Plot Spoiler Ahead

 This is a movie about a guy, who is only attracted to the superficial attributes of  women, their body,  hair color, skin color, smile…. physical attributes, that is. As much as he tries, he is not able to see their inner beauty… whether they are kind, compassionate, caring, sensitive.. the works. As a result, no woman wants to go out with him 😀 ( I say… serves him right!). And then one day he gets stuck in an elevator with a Life Guru.. who hypnotizes him to see the inner beauty.

Soon after Shallow Hal meets a pretty young girl ( Gweneth Paltrow) and starts going around with her. He is smitten and besotted and his friend cannot see why. Actually.. the girl is fat. But since SH has been hypnotized… he sees her as pretty… coz he is seeing who she is at heart.

After that it is the regular masala… hypnosis is snapped… guy realises that he loves fat girl… happy ending.

Anonymous Monkey Friend: 

This guy is seriously into getting married. He has registered on all matrimony sites and is found regularly “expressing his interest” on random profiles from the broadband in our home. His criteria for selection for his bride….

… is not that she be sensible and intelligent

…is not that she be respectful and sincere..

…or that she has a sweet, agreeable nature..

..but..

… that she be slim…

…and pretty

…and fair…

It amuses me I tell you… when I hear him discuss all this with H. Because H fell in love with a “pleasantly plump” SS! 😀 He is the last person who would have anything to do with how a person looks! It also irks me… because… if I were to rate Anonymous Monkey Friend on looks… I would give him a 3 on 10. And so I mutter about it.. under my breath… about how some people should get real in life!

But the sad thing is.. and that brings me to Happening No. 3…. that some poor sweet creature would still marry this guy…. and think the world of him… and realise that despite his shallow preferences in the opposite sex… he still is one of the more genuine guys she has met. She will learn to brush aside his quirks… and magnify his small victories and make a hero out of him.

…and then she might get pregnant.. and lose her fab body… this sucker might start to eye other eye candy (even if it is only for the sake of eyeing!)…. while she waddles her way through life.. and labor… and kids. And then by the time he sees her for who she is… he would have made a cynic out of her… who wouldn’t care about how he feels… or maybe… he would have turned her into an insecure, nervous, gas bag… who will have learnt to see herself through her husband’s eyes.. as a non attention worthy creature.

I say to all the guys…you say women have body image issues. Why will they not have body image issues? I know beauty is what brings about the initial attraction… but is it enough to sustain it? You as a guy make it amply clear that you are into superficial physical attributes… why won’t the woman get worried and try and look good for you? Why won’t she buy more cosmetics than books?

And you know what is sad… despite all then she will probably still love you the same…….even when YOU go bald and potbellied.

What do you think? Would you agree with me?

This is not going to be a narrative post.

…And that is because this 6:30 waking up thing has made life such a blur:-/ Seriously! For the past 5-6 days… I haven’t had the satisfaction of sleeping well.  Somehow, life has become exciting enough for me not to sleep before 11 pm…. and then I jump start my day at 5:45 am! And so I’m just not getting enough sleep… and everyday I say to myself that I will hit the pillow by 10.. but it is not to be…

The result of this blur of activity has been that I have been having Monday morning blues for the entire week ! (:D ) And you thought it was only about Mondays… didya?

So anyways… I reach office… and then a strong shot of caffeine later… I begin to wake up little by little, and by the time I wake up enough to post something… it is lunch time… and then I start going to sleep little by little….. and then one more strong shot of caffeeine, later… I gear up again… only to realise that it is time to go back home.

(…I’m rambling…)

So anyways…back to updates on driving. The driving is proceeding fine… and the highlights of this week have been…

1. Being stranded on the BIG Bad Road (Remember?) with no fuel… and slowly (S-L-O-W-L-Y)… driving the car alone… while the instructor made a dash for the nearest petrol pump.

2. Hitting the clutch at every possible oppurtunity…. I don’t understand why I do that… Its a strange impulse… I don’t know how my brain got programmed that way about the clutch… its really strange.

3. Being told by Cocky Driver… “Madam… steering ko phool ki tarah pakdo” .. if there ever was a vacany for a poetic driving instructor… then this guy would surely qualify 🙂

4. Cocky Driver not coming for 3-4 days in between. He was supposedly out of town… Ofcourse he didn’t think it was worth his while to tell me…. and ofcourse I woke up at 5:45 each day :-/

5. I got my Learner’s License.(yay!) 🙂

I also saw some movies.. and went on a day trip… and felt philosophical about some things while I wasn’t posting…I will write more… but after a caffeine shot! 😀 😀

Btw.. if I’ve got you curious… you could also go and read Part I and Part II of my Driving Stories

…. with a guy….

Who wakes up bright and early on a Sunday morning and fixes you breakfast.. dil se …

Who takes pictures of the moon… because you love looking at the moon, and when confronted… scoffs… “I was just experimenting with the camera”

Who wakes you up… and wakes you up… with a vengeance.. so that you can both go and catch sunrises… and sundry birds

Who covers up the boarded A/C duct, with a “painting” bought off the streets of CP, to make it aesthetically pleasing for you, on your first visit to his room

Who goes along with your brilliant sense of photography.. as you insist on taking pics of random cows

….and fish…

… and monkeys! Of the human type

and finally, who encourages you to sail into the horizon… but of course.. come back to him…. 🙂

You go and give the poor unsuspecting guy a BIG Hug to squeeze the air out of his lungs! And some more affectionate actions… not to be mentioned here 😉 And you leave him confused at this unexpected display of love from his always poised, sometimes  irritable wife 😀

What do you do when your best friend of 11 years pings you and tells you that she is moving out of the country for the next 1 – 2 years…

Are you happy? For the exciting new world she is stepping into?.. for the experiences she will have, the people she will meet, the places she will see…

…or… are you sad? Because you will probably never ever be in the same boat together again. She will not be online for you to share your silly thoughts… she will never be close enough to visit on a long weekend, and going forward, both of your lives will change, and go along divergent paths?

Actually.. you will be both… and both unsuccessfully… 😦

N and I. Best friends. Sisters.. more like it. Connected at the heart. Always together.

N and I go back a long way… 11 years! We met for the first time on the 3rd or 4th day of college and from then, there was no stopping us.  We had so much in common… the things we laughed about, the things that bothered us, our dreams about life, our friends, our teachers, our subjects…from what we did in class, to what we did out of it.

Most of all… our conversations… yes.. 🙂  those lovely conversations… starting from the days when we were standing on the bus stop waiting for the DTC buses… in scorching Delhi heat. We’d get so engrossed in our talks, that we were ready to brave more heat and give buses a miss, one after the other, so that we could just talk… to now.. when we ping each other almost each day… sharing mundanities of our world.  We always had access to each other, in person… over phone, over smses… over Gtalk. No matter what was going on in our lives…  We never let go…We went from being on the same path to being on parallel paths…but there was always a link… we were always in our “phases” together. 

We went through further studies, through our love lives, through marriage almost in sync.. with similar hopes and fears and dreams… showing each other the sunshiny side of things when the other was in the pits.. I had always felt that we would be “growing old together’… with me a wild and whacky mausi to her sensible kids and she a sensible mausi to my wild set.

Somehow… after a long time, I feel like we are not in sync… not on parallel paths… but on diverging ones. I have a feeling that the coming 1-2 years will change us an awful lot. She is still a new bride…with a life full of possibilities, and excitement… and I have a headstart on her with marriage.. and will be on the threshold of starting a family. We will have different priorities…. will be feeling different things… and both of us will be taking such huge steps… that we will change as people.

I hate how we just cannot take certain things for granted anymore… Like life long friendship…like being in each others thoughts… like being able to reach people…. like knowing that I will not have to pack my bags and leave for a new country tommorrow, like a regular job… where I go, do my work, without a thought of yesterday or tomorrow.

Today..I see no sense in planning because we are living in a world which is ever changing.

I see no meaning of “forever” 😦

PS: N, I wish you all the very very best on this new and exciting journey that you are embarking on. You are a lovely person and you truly truly deserve the best 🙂  Don’t think about this post much.. its most probably the hormones!  I know that we will try our best to always be in sync. Please start a blog! Please!  ( ya, I know that you know that I was going to say this 😀 )

Lots of Hugs and lots of more hugs

…and bear hugs

…and crazy.. “let’s rock it till we are 80′ dancing hugs

I love you!

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